Saturday, March 10, 2012

The Douchebag

CrossFit is known for it's douchebagery almost as much as it's known for it's brutal, intense workout style. In fact, when I first started expressing an interest in CrossFit, I had a couple people mention to me how they'd love to belong to a box, but there are too many assholes there to make it enjoyable.

I've kept this in the back of my mind, but to be honest, I really hadn't encountered much of it at all. Until today.....

My local affiliate has a blog and that's where the WODs are posted daily and we're all encouraged to leave our results in the comments. Typically, an entire side conversation gets started and it's just another forum for this close knit community that I've found myself suddenly a member of.

I'm slowly getting to know the members of our box either through the classes I'm in or from chatting with people during the kids' WODS, but it's a slow process to really fit in at a place like this. Everyone has gone out of their way to make us feel welcome and a few women, in particular, have really taken me under their wing and always come to check on me after a workout or just ask how I'm doing that day.

Yesterday, on the blog, someone anonymously left a rather snarky comment directed to "the new members". It was along the lines of making sure you say hello back when someone goes out of their way to offer you a warm, sincere hello. The comment went on to say that if you can't, at the very least, acknowledge when someone says hello to you, then maybe you should find another gym.

My husband was severely offended. We have no idea if that comment was directed to us or not, as there have been several other new people in the last few weeks and honestly, it could have been directed to anyone.

I skipped yesterday's WOD with the promise to myself that no matter what it was, I would go workout this morning. Saturday mornings and PACKED and I've avoided them up until this point, but a promise to myself is a promise to myself.

In the words of one of the coaches, "Today's WOD was a motherfucker." And it was. Once I saw it, I immediately regretted skipping yesterday, but I had to go. I wasn't going to cherry pick my workouts because I was afraid. I walked into the box this morning with butterflies in my stomach and that comment ringing in my ears.....for the first time since joining this box I truly felt like I just didn't belong. Even before the workout started, I was in tears. I wanted nothing more than to just turn around and go home and hide in the corner, and to be honest, if my kids class wasn't immediately afterwards, I probably would have. I stayed for my kids.

Unbeknownst to me, my husband had left a reply to the comment while I was busting my ass and crying my eyes out during the WOD this morning. He explained that coming into a place like this is intimidating as hell and one of the saving graces was the immense sense of community and support that we've gotten since we've joined. He continued on to say that this comment made us "newbies" feel like this box is only for senior members and "real cross fitters" and that it was displaying exactly the OPPOSITE sense of community that we'd been led to believe we were joining.

Oh holy hell....can I just tell you how many comments have come out of the wood work? So many people jumping in to welcome us and tell this anonymous commenter to find THEMSELVES another gym and that comments like that were NOT representative of the group, we got personal emails from the owners and some other coaches, regular members reached out to us to let us know they were happy to see our entire family there and looking forward to getting to know us better.

I get it....the owner need to protect their customers and "save the sale". They don't want us to leave, from a business standpoint, but the sincerity was there. I've never felt so supported and encouraged. It warmed my heart to see so many people jump to our defense and tell a "regular" to EFF OFF (basically).

I have to say....I've been leary of the douchebagery reputation and I'm certain there are some boxes out there filled with them, but everyday I'm more and more convinced that we've found one of the good ones.....

Now, if I could only get my own douchebagery comments out of my OWN head (the ones that tell me I don't belong, that I have no business doing these types of workouts, that I can't keep up....) then I'll be in business. But you know what? That personal douchebag is getting quieter and quieter every day. I've got goals and I will not let a douchebag (imaginary or real) get in the way of me reaching them.


  1. You know what... the type of people to leave rude comments must have their own personal problems or they wouldn't act that way. I've been trying to tell myself that when someone says something less than nice to me. We all have our own baggage- it helps me to understand and deal with people like that a little better.

    But you belong. If you want to be there, you belong. Because that's really the reason you're all there!

  2. Kudos for even going! I am still working on having that much nerve.